If while giving to another, you are hurting, bitter, reluctant or compromising yourself, and the only positive payoff you get is to avoid being judged or looking bad, or to feel superior or appear righteous in the eyes of another, then the giving in that instance is a sin. Would a God called Love want you to suffer, ever? Give the good that’s already in you, the kind you’re authentically delighted to give. Your own inner state matters just as much as anyone else’s. Indeed, it’s all you ever needed to be concerned with in the first place.