Negotiation is only difficult when the following are present: 1) A sense of lack, or, in other words, a belief that more opportunities won’t come your way to have what you really desire, so you had better abandon what you actually want, hurry, and take what’s being presented before you’re left with nothing 2) A belief that by asking for precisely what you want, you risk people becoming upset at you 3) Your primary goal, above the goal at hand for which you’re negotiating, is to avoid upsetting people (or avoid appearing selfish/greedy/ungrateful, looking bad).
First, realize deeply that by asking for what you want, you are not taking what you want. To negotiate is to give the other party the opportunity to comply/agree to give you what you want, or decline your request.
Negotiation is simply a back-and-forth between two parties, each speaking candidly about their own desired outcomes.
What a free & beautiful type of conversation to have with another. What an opportunity for creative problem-solving so that both parties might win. Thus, negotiation is not competitive or confrontational, but rather collaborative in nature.
Enter your negotiations with a clear vision, clarity about what you truly desire, and what you’re truly willing or able to concede. Your only job is to know yourself, what you want. The person on the other side of the table is hardly even necessary. Need only know yourself.