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Dignity

Codependents often confuse dignity for arrogance.   Similarly, they may also confuse worthiness for entitlement.

This belief structure leads to a submissive disposition, and often a kindness toward others that is driven by fear.  Principles, like honesty, are also prone to becoming lost, as the codependent’s main goal is to, at all costs, avoid appearing arrogant or entitled or selfish. Disingenuous complements may be given, and facts may be watered down or omitted, all because of a few unexamined assumptions: 1) the truth isn’t enough 2) people don’t want me to shine – they’ll dislike me for being magnificent 3) my survival depends on the approval of others.  
All three are illusions.

 

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